a) Hello! My name is…
I grew up Muslim, in a Muslim majority country, raised with Islamic principles. But my closest friends were Christians: Catholics, Protestants and Mormons.
You don’t hear much about Mormons outside American media. So it was a surprise to find a local Latter-Day Saints (LDS) chapter not far from where I grew up. What are the odds?
I was on pretty good terms with the Mormons. We sat together during recess, played football after school. I think I got invited over to the church once (but I didn’t go at the time, for reasons to be made clear). In 2012, during the US elections, we’d joke about Mitt Romney (a Mormon) versus Barack Obama1. It was all in jest, nothing more than juvenile humor.
These friendships were my first exposure to Mormonism. We have things in common—like alcohol is forbidden. While I admit that Mormon theology is (still) largely unfamiliar to me, I’ve come to appreciate them.
Over the years, I found myself fascinated by their practices and way of life. The more I learned about them, the more I respected them, especially in comparison to how they’re often portrayed in pop culture via South Park or The Book of Mormon musical.
b) Mormons on a Mission
My interactions with Mormons didn’t stop with childhood friends. I’ve met many others over the years, whether through online forums like Discord or missionaries out in the world.
In Malaysia, the Mormons are not allowed to preach to the local Muslims. Religion is a highly sensitive topic. But when I come across Mormons at the train station or a public space, I’ll strike up a conversation. They're from some other part of the world (mostly the American Midwest), so I have to play my part in welcoming guests to the country. I’d like to hear their stories too. I am always curious to know how they view their mission and their experiences.
One winter in Australia, I answered my door to two LDS missionaries. A Mandarin-speaking American girl, and an English-speaking Chinese girl. Yes, read that again. All I could think was: did someone swap the audio files? They spoke fluently in non-native tongues. How cool is that!?!
Mormon missionaries, like these girls, often endure long periods of isolation, ridicule, some rejection or worse: being completely ignored. Yet they persist with a sense of calm and purpose.
It’s admirable, really.
c) Training for a Latter Day
The LDS is of course an institution. One that emphasizes community. The LDS Church has a built-in network that not only connects members worldwide but also helps them secure jobs and opportunities. I’ve known my friends have gotten gigs with American expats through their church, further solidifying this global support system.
The Church also invests in training their members with practical skills by sending them on missions. The missionary work gives young Mormons an opportunity to develop skills and themselves.
They are thrust into unfamiliar environments. There they must learn the local culture and language, like the girls speaking in non-native tongues.
They have to be ambassadors of their faith. Because the missionaries are most people’s first and only exposure to the Mormons, they have to put their best foot forward and leave a respectable impression.
They have to learn to persuade and preach—hold people’s attention and keep people engaged. Useful skills in any business.
But the tough part is, they have to face ridicule, loneliness, and rejection. They may also have to learn how to deal with more antagonistic and hostile individuals. They have to learn to maintain composure and take the high road.
Perhaps there’s something to be said about what the mission experience does in setting Mormons up for life. Afterall, there’s plenty of famous people who happen to be Mormons. To name a few, Mitt Romney (again), business gurus like Clay Christensen and Stephen Covey, even Mr. Brightside himself—Brandon Flowers. If you count ex-Mormons (ExMos), that list is even be longer
d) Binding Ties
Mormon culture is rich with community, material support, and lifelong relationships. But like any organization—whether it’s religious, corporate, or political—the LDS Church has its own set of internal pressures. It can be repressive to some folks who diverge from the norm.
For all the benefits of being a Latter-day Saint, it is hard to leave the church. Leaving the church often means giving up not just your faith and the material upside, but relationships built over a lifetime. It’s a high price to pay, and many ExMos face being ostracized.
e) The High Road to the Divine
One major thing I’ve always respected about the Mormons is their grace. I’ve never had a bad interaction with one. I’ve had disagreements but they were always civil.
I can see why it might give people the creeps. Being so nice despite facing some hostility. Not responding aggression in kind. But that’s just it, the Mormons (to an extent) are actually decent people.
When The Book of Mormon musical came out, the church took out full-page ads in playbills, inviting audiences to learn more. Instead of responding with outrage, they took the high road—by inviting others to have an open conversation.
Katherine Dee has a post on the useful wisdom of the Mormons:
There’s a great quote I once heard from BYU professor of Religious Education, Robert L. Millet, about how Latter-day Saints should handle hostility on their missions. He says, “Whenever a person asks me an antagonistic question, I never answer that question, but rather, I answer the question they should have asked.”
…
Read one way, we can understand it as, “Ignore challenges to your faith by diverting the conversation.” And maybe a step further, cast those people who are questioning you as antagonistic.
But from a different angle, the interpretation is closer to, “When someone is trying to hurt or mock me, instead I give them the context they need to understand me.”
Whether you believe in the Church’s teachings or not, it’s undeniable that missionaries get a lot of harassment. And frankly, this is awesome advice for anyone trying to respond to that with diplomacy.
Personally, I think they’ve figured out how to navigate a secular world whilst trying to keep in touch with the divine.
A final note: Spotify Wrapped placed my listening habits as similar to those in Provo, Utah. Perhaps, in another life, I might’ve been Mormon too.
Inspirations
The All-American Religion
The Mormon people teach the American religion; their principles teach the people not only of Heaven and its attendant glories, but how to live so that their social and economic relations with each other are placed on a sound basis. - Leo Tolstoy
The Book of Mormon (musical)
I loved the musical. I caught the show in Australia, with none of the OG cast though. It’s funny, satirizes the LDS, pointing out the silliness. But they painted the Mormons in an earnest and respectable light too.
I was surprised to find out the writers of the musical were Matt and Trey of South Park. Of course it is.
Even more surprised the composer of the music was Robert Lopez, who went on to write Disney’s definitive hit of the 2010s: Let It Go.
Also, there’s a Korean version of the Book of Mormon.
Latter-Day Ain’t
I’ve been a fan of default_friend / Katherine Dee’s writings and thinking. Some of her pieces on Mormonism articulates what I’ve similarly observed in ways that I never could. Do check it out:
Barack Hussein Obama. The former POTUS grew up in Indonesia and has an Arabic middle name. Hence he fell into the ‘Muslim’ camp. Yes, I’m aware of the politics and fearmongering of the time. Look, we were teens. That, to us, was highbrow humor. 🤣