Choices
a resolution to live more boldly
I. Introduction
Last year, I took a career break.
It wasn’t an easy decision. I was cautioned to get the bonus check first before handing in my resignation. Others have told me to wait for a job offer before I quit. Their advice was well-intentioned. Have something solid to stand on as I look for a better job. Have something I can fall back on as I work towards a better life.
Because going on a sabbatical meant giving up job security and income (plus that bonus too!). It meant that I would be delaying my own plans at financial independence. I would be hampering my own career prospects. I would have to explain that gap on my resume to employers. I would be facing months, if not years, of uncertainty. Worse, I could be running into dead-ends. By the end, I would have nothing to show for it. I was taking a risk.
Fate had me in a bind. But I had to make a choice: I can let things happen as they come OR take a chance at something that might turn the odds in my favor.
As an economist, I think a lot about the choices we make and their consequences.
Those choices can be as trivial as what shirt to wear or what to eat for breakfast. You can decide on a coin flip.
But other choices, like picking a career or who to marry (and when), have far greater implications. These decisions require serious deliberation.
Some consequences are immediate: you play with fire, you get burned. Other consequences are not as clear or direct. It could come about if you make the same decision time and again, like skipping a workout and not meeting your workout resolutions (don’t be shocked by the number on the bathroom scale). There could also be a lag, like investing in a stock on borrowed money (leveraged 20x), being absolutely certain they would only go up, only to see them come crashing down the next month.
Our choices are influenced by our circumstances—the conditions we live in, the constraints we face, and our perceptions of potential consequences. While we can't control every outcome, our choices define our path. Ultimately, it's through the act of choosing, of actively shaping our lives, that we find true meaning.
But then, why do we find ourselves making choices against our own best interests? What is it that stops us from stepping onto our own path of fulfillment?
II. The Easy Way Out
We live in a world of instant gratification. Just pour hot water to make a cup of coffee (or noodles). A few taps on the phone and we have our favorite meal delivered within the hour. It is so easy to satisfy our desires.
It’s like that modern proverb: “buy cheap, pay twice”. We want it easy. Buying that bargain-bin laptop, only to find it crashing next year, forcing you to fork out even more money for repairs. Using chatGPT to write your homework, only to find you have learned nothing for the exam. Opting for stop-gap measures that treat the symptoms but ignore the root causes—like taking on statins to lower your cholesterol but neglect to exercise and watch your diet.
I think our brains are just hard-wired to want that short-term gratification. We choose that gratification because they are so easy and so cheap to come by. We do them because we get immediate validation. We get tangible results. Why have that marshmallow later, when it’s right there in front of you. Wait any longer, and we might not have it.
It’s not inherently wrong to go for the quick fix, as sometimes there are urgent and important things that need to be addressed ASAP, then can we only look for the more permanent solution.
This pursuit of easy gratification permeates our lives in subtle ways. At work, we choose tasks that offer quick wins and instant recognition, even if they don't contribute to our long-term career goals. In our relationships, we seek immediate validation and attention, neglecting the deeper work of commitment and genuine connection.
Our insatiable hunger for instant satisfaction blinds us to the hidden costs these decisions have that far outweigh the initial benefits. Because if we just let ourselves choose the easy way out all the time, we will pay dearly.
The late Clay Christensen, a management guru, has an insight on this phenomenon in the context of business strategy. He observes that companies often fall prey to unintended strategies, pursuing short-term gains that ultimately undermine their own long-term viability. He writes:
“...because companies’ decision-making systems are designed to steer investments to initiatives that offer the most tangible and immediate returns, companies shortchange investments in initiatives that are crucial to their long-term strategies.”
Companies chase quarterly profits. They cut costs by laying off workers. They do these things in the hopes of maximizing shareholder value. But in doing so, they neglect the investments in innovation, customer relationships, and employee development that are crucial for sustained success. Funny enough, these things (done extremely well) improve the company’s value on the market, thereby maximizing shareholder value.
Besides our own nature to want the quick and easy, we do face a monster of a system that exploits this tendency towards short-term gratification. We have KPIs to meet, and obligations to fulfill. We are incentivised to pursue the tangible and the immediate. It is difficult NOT to choose the easy way out.
Christensen also notes:
“Over the years I’ve watched the fates of my HBS classmates from 1979 unfold; I’ve seen more and more of them come to reunions unhappy, divorced, and alienated from their children. I can guarantee you that not a single one of them graduated with the deliberate strategy of getting divorced and raising children who would become estranged from them. And yet a shocking number of them implemented that strategy.”
Just as no company decides to destroy their own business, no one sets out to marry and have a divorce, no one plans to have their kids hate them. Yet people choose that short-lived gratification, even otherwise smart, educated people with great resources at their disposal.
III. Indecision
Economists like to say there are no free lunches. Every choice has its costs, a trade-off baked into the act of choosing. We’re not just giving up your hard-earned money when we buy a new phone. We’re also giving up the alternatives we can use that money for, such as investing or an overseas trip. That’s the price—the opportunity cost—of a decision.
But there’s also an opportunity cost with not making a choice. Indecision, like its active counterpart, has its own set of consequences. They are missed opportunities and unrealized potentials. It's like standing at a crossroads, paralyzed by indecision, while the path we were meant to take fades into the distance.
In his autobiography, A Man for All Markets, Ed Thorp shares an anecdote of a friend, Mr. Davis who would not sell a house for less than $ 3.5 million. That friend received offers in the ballpark of $ 3 million, but would not relent. So insistent on selling it at that price, it took him 10 years before finding a buyer for $ 3.25 million. 10 Years!
Even before adjusting for inflation, waiting 10 years for inflation is a waste. Because the opportunity cost is that he could have taken the $ 3 million, bought a smaller house for $ 1 million, and invested the rest. By Ed Thorp’s calculation, Mr. Davis could have made over $ 5 million.
We waste resources with indecision. Like a manager who just can’t make up his mind, keeping the staff anxious. as their precious time gets wasted when they could have spent it on other parts of work, or spend time with their families. It happens in committees where members keep passing the buck around and never coming to a conclusion. No decision is made, no results produced. Because no one did anything, everyone was absolved of blame.
At a personal level, indecision leads to terrible consequences. It comes with a gradual erosion of self-belief Doubting whether we’re any good at all. Haunted by thoughts of what could have been. When this gets compounded over time, our indecision manifests as regret.
IV. Fallacies and Fear
Psychologists have made up a whole list of fallacies and cognitive biases that, while helpful at times, causes us to make bad decisions. There’s the sunk cost fallacy, keeping us on a miserable path, making us double down on a losing outcome. There’s loss aversion or negativity bias, where the pain of losing hurts so much and lingers for much longer than the fleeting joy of gaining.
But really, these are all just manifestations of something more primal. something that can be felt in our bones.
Fear.
Fear manifests in many guises. There's the fear of failure. The voice that whispers doubts in our ears. It tells us to imagine the pain, and humiliation of failure. It makes us hesitate, freeze up and run away. It's the fear that keeps us from pursuing our dreams, from putting ourselves out there into the world.
There's the fear of judgment. Carl Jung’s Superego. Seeding us with anxiety about what others will think of our choices. It's the fear that conforms us to societal expectations, even if they don't align with our true desires.
And then there’s the fear of uncertainty and change. It comes with the discomfort of stepping into the unknown, the resistance to disrupting established patterns, where outcomes are unpredictable and control is an illusion. We crave the comfort of familiarity, predictability. Even if it means settling for a life that is unfulfilling.
What’s insidious about fear is that it disguises itself as being reasonable. It gives us seemingly rational advice. It tells us to stay in our lane, to stick with what we know, to play it safe. It tells us not to rock the boat, to not make that choice. This advice lulls us into a false sense of security.
Graham Weaver, a successful entrepreneur, echoes this sentiment in a speech:
“…for most of you and through your lives, the biggest obstacle you really have is going to be fear, if you really boil it down. And fear is very manipulative. And it shows up in all these kinds of different ways. And it tries to disguise itself. It disguises itself as being practical. I’m being practical right now. It disguises itself as I’m helping you. It disguises itself as I’m saving you. And most of all, it disguises itself as not me, not now.”
Fear, while a natural instinct, often acts like a prison warden. Keeping us locked in our comfort zones, and making sure we stay there. We thwart our own ambitions and invite regret into our lives if we let fear keep us there.
To truly embrace the power of choice, we must first acknowledge our fears, confront them boldly. For it is on the other side of fear that we often find our greatest fulfillment.
V. Courage to Choose
Tom Hardy revealed in a recent interview on how he came up with the voice of Bane in the Dark Knight Rises:
“I said listen we could get really laughed at here this could be ridiculous but it's an interesting sound silhouette and it might work. …it's better than being mediocre you know and having like people going meh it wasn't a choice.”
He anticipated that they would be facing a risk with the voice, he anticipated a polarized reception. That they would be ridiculed (a phenomenon known as baneposting), or applauded for it (the movie still made over a billion dollars). Still, Tom Hardy and director Christopher Nolan, went ahead with it.
Making a choice requires some measure of courage. It comes with risks. Because we can never be sure about the outcome. There’s always that chance of disappointment, criticism and failure. That is the consequence of making a choice.
But what’s the alternative? Not making a choice and just letting things happen as it were? By avoiding risk, clinging to the safety of not having to decide, we risk something worse. A life unlived and one full of regrets.
This is the true consequence of NOT making a choice, of NOT taking risks, we expose ourselves to greater risks. We fail to develop the resilience and adaptability needed to handle life’s challenges. Like a muscle that atrophies without use, our capacity for growth diminishes when we shrink away from the unfamiliar.
We have to be brave and overcome those fears. Because we learn from our missteps, stumbles and falls. Each mistake, each setback, is an opportunity to improve ourselves and to emerge stronger.
VI. Agency
Agency, at its core, is the ability to make conscious choices to take ownership of our lives, regardless of the circumstances we face. You can just do things.
The Bible too proclaims the need for agency:
"Ask and you shall receive; seek and you shall find; knock and the door will be opened" —Matthew 7:7
It’s never going to be easy. We don’t lose that fear each time we’re presented with a choice. We have to be brave each time we have to choose. Cultivating agency is an ongoing practice.
Just as we can improve our decision making process, we can build up our capacity to make choices, to be decisive, to exercise our agency. It is a skill. It requires us to develop self-awareness, to identify our values, and to set clear goals. It's about recognizing the choices we have, even when they seem limited, and taking responsibility for the consequences of those choices.
Recently, I landed a job. A job that I am excited for. At least for now, it aligns with my longer term goals.
It took some deliberation, because I felt under-qualified for the role. It would require me months of prep and study to just get the gist of the role. It also required from me that small dose of courage to ask around for help and connections. I could have just as easily applied for the role on the job sites. But I knew the default option means having to go through too many layers. It starts with the recruiter in HR, then the HR manager, then the department’s hiring manager, before it comes to whoever has the ultimate power in making decisions.
It meant many decisions had to go my way, hoping my resume would fall into the right hands. That means waiting out for months, if that was going to happen at all.
I didn’t want that uncertainty, not anymore. I had a choice, to wait out or take a shot in the dark. So I took a deep breath, reached out to a few people I knew, and landed an interview within weeks. I got the job.
The sabbatical paid off.
VII. Resolution
For 2025, I made the resolution to embrace boldness.
To make that bold choice, and execute on it. To make a bet on myself. Not the reckless, impulsive kind of choice. But a mindful, calculated kind of boldness. That stems from thoughtful deliberation and a willingness to take calculated risks.
This resolution reflects everything I've learned about the power of choice. It's a commitment to living a life that is true to my values. One that I hope helps me determine purpose and meaning in life.
It's a commitment to pursuing my ambition with renewed vigor, and to facing my fears with courage. It’s a commitment to exercising and expressing my agency. To let myself be heard, even if people disagree. To be just that much more decisive and have a bias to action. To be optimistic, but accepting of outcomes whatever they might be.
Life, as I see it, is shaped by the countless choices we make (or don’t). By making conscious choices, we get to shape and transform our lives. The power is always in our choosing.
Inspirations
Avoid the sunk cost fallacy and make a career pivot by Coach Erika and Leo Alexandru
Graham Weaver’s Lectures
How Will You Measure Your Life by Clay Christensen